Learning to pole dance is like falling in love. It requires VULNERABILITY; the capacity to surrender the protective armor that prevents us from getting hurt. In pole dancing, however, vulnerability puts us at risk both emotionally and physically.
What stands in the way of our vulnerability? FEAR. Fear stifles our greatest potential by keeping us stuck in our comfort zone. And it’s far easier to nurture our fears and insecurities than to muster the guts to relinquish them. It’s ironic but, we find safety in such a fearful existence, although our dreams may elude us.
We nurture our fears by allowing negative mental chatter to persist. We somehow convince ourselves that “I’m too weak”, “I’m too heavy”, “I’m too uncoordinated”, or “I’ll never be as good as ____________________”. Before even daring to attempt something new, we’ve persuaded ourselves that we can’t. Yet, underneath that fear, we know that what we really want, is to become some kinda pole dancing badass. So to rationalize and defend our safe choice, we detach ourselves from our dreams. Just as those afraid of falling in love pretend that relationships are over-rated, we do the same with the pole tricks we consider to be the impossible dreams.
When negative mental chatter reminds us that, “I’m not sexy”, “I’m not graceful”, “I’m not creative”, or “I can’t dance”, we detach ourselves emotionally by turning pole dancing into a mechanical experience; completely devoid of individuality or self-expression. We hide behind technical proficiency rather than allowing ourselves to feel the music and experience the pleasure of our own sensuality. Yet pole dancing without emotion is like love without passion.
When we finally find the strength of surrender and face our fears as pole dancers, we’re granted this euphoric BLISS that, dare I say, mimics love. Our vulnerability produces strength, courage and confidence that ushers us towards our greatest goals; even mastering that which at first seemed impossible. So, as the negative mental chatter dares shatter our dreams, we replace those words with “I am strong”, “I am flexible”, “I am sexy”, “I am capable”, “I am unique”, “I am creative”, and “Damnit, I am an amazing pole dancer!”. We embrace our strengths, recognize our progress and continue to take action toward our goals in pole dancing (& in love)
Kira Lamb | www.ClimbAndSpin.com
Kira Lamb is the Co-Creator of Climb & Spin Inc, offering comprehensive pole dance certifications & teacher training programs for pole dance instructors. Climb & Spin is endorsed by the United States Pole Dance Federation.
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